Imagine being on the brink of landing your dream job, only to have your mental health history unexpectedly surface. That's precisely what happened to me, and it left me grappling with a dilemma: should I be honest about my ongoing struggles or hide them to secure the position?
The Turning Point:
During the final moments of a promising job interview, my potential employer revealed they'd discovered an old video of me singing a self-written song while hospitalized for mental health issues. They asked, "Is all that behind you now?" Caught off-track, I chose to lie, assuring them it was in the past, even though I was currently experiencing a depressive episode.
This wasn't an isolated incident. I've navigated my professional life in what I call the "honesty gap," often downplaying or omitting my mental health challenges to secure employment. But this strategy came at a cost.
The Cost of Concealment:
I did get the job, but the pressure to maintain a facade of high functioning pushed me to overwork and exceptionalism. I felt the need to prove my reliability, fearing that my mental health struggles might label me as unstable. This led to a silent, relentless pressure to overcompensate.
Working in the mental health field made it easier to discuss mental health in general, but talking about my own experiences in the present tense remained challenging. I found an unexpected solution: experimenting with honesty outside of work.
A Creative Outlet:
I started sharing more openly about my mental health in my creative endeavors, which eventually led to creating a memoir podcast. This podcast, 'No Feeling Is Final', unexpectedly gained popularity, and it changed the game for my professional life.
The Power of Disclosure:
Now, in many workplaces, people are aware of my mental health history. While this has led to some awkward moments, it has also paved the way for greater honesty. I've learned that being open about my struggles doesn't diminish my competence; instead, it showcases my self-awareness and proactive approach to managing my well-being.
Recently, while leading a high-pressure project, I reached a breaking point. I bravely disclosed my anxiety and the potential for a depressive episode to my boss over a Zoom call. To my relief, she understood and agreed to have a backup plan in place.
This experience taught me that honesty about my mental health doesn't have to be a career-limiting move. In fact, it can foster a more supportive work environment and lead to more sustainable success.
While I still have work to do in closing the honesty gap, this journey has shown me that being open about my mental health can lead to better outcomes, both personally and professionally. It's a delicate balance, but one worth striving for.
The Question Remains:
How can we create workplaces where employees feel safe disclosing mental health issues without fear of judgment or professional repercussions? Is it possible to foster an environment where honesty about mental health is not only accepted but also encouraged and supported? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.
